A Visit from Beyond...

It's 2:30 on Saturday, an hour before the kickoff of what may be the biggest college football game ever. Number 1 Ohio State vs. Number 2 Michigan. The Buckeye players sit in the locker room, eagerly awaiting the arrival of head coach Jim Tressel for his pregame speech. Surely he'll have something special to say, they think. After all, this was the man who in his first public appearance as head coach promised the crowd at an OSU basketball game that they would be proud of the football team in 310 days in Ann Arbor.

Tressel and the rest of the coaching staff walk in, but instead of standing up front, they all take seats with the players. As they look around wondering what is going on, a shadowy figure emerges. It does not take long for everyone to realize who it is. The hat, the red shirt, the glasses, they're all dead giveaways. It's Woody, and he's come to give the boys a pep talk.

"Men, in a little less than an hour from now, you will be taking part in history. You will be participating in the biggest sporting rivalry our great nation has to offer. For some of you, this will be your last time playing this game, and for others, your first. But no matter how many times you have been involved in this battle, I sincerely hope your hatred for that state up north is as strong as it's ever been.

"Now I'm sure most if not all of you heard the story of this great rivalry before, but since I'm a great admirer of history, I'll tell it to you again. The animosity first began in the 1830s, when both Ohio and Michigan laid claim to the Toledo area. Since Ohio was a state and had voting power, while Michigan was still only a territory, the government gave the land to Ohio, just as militias were preparing for a war.

"The football games began in 1897, and in the early years, Michigan kicked our asses. Once I was hired, though, I made it a point to never let that happen. In my first eighteen seasons I won twelve times, and in many of those games the Big Ten and national championships were on the line for one and or the other. Then, there was the Ten Year War against my friend and former assistant Bo Schembechler. I went 5-4-1 against him, but managed to share the Big Ten title with him six times.

"In the decade after I left the series was virtually even, but that changed when John Cooper came along. As great of a coach as he was, he could not beat Michigan, and that is why he is not in this room right now. He had some fantastic teams, top five several times, but he only won the game twice, costing him at least two national titles. This man you have now, Mr. Tressel, now he's the right man for this game. That thing he said at the basketball game when he was hired? I was watching from up there, and I loved it.

"But enough about history. Today is your history. For the first time ever Michigan and The Ohio State are entering their game in the top two spots in the rankings, with the winner going on to the national championship game. If that doesn't make you want to go out there and kill this team, then you don't deserve to put on shoulder pads. This is the biggest game ever in the biggest rivalry ever. The hell with those flashy southern teams and the ones out west. The best goddamn football is right here in the Big Ten, the best game of the season is happening right here, and the best fucking team in the country is right here in this room!

"Men, this is more than a football game; this is war. This is the resumption of that battle 160 years ago, when people from Michigan thought they could come in to our turf and claim it as their own. You have been chosen to defend your land, no matter what the cost. You are playing this game for your state, for your classmates, your families, your friends, Ohio State alumni, and anyone who has ever put on the Scarlet and Gray, whether it was to play for us or cheer for us on a Saturday afternoon. Rose Bowls and national titles are all well and good, but what matters most is beating Michigan. You can lose every game by 100 points, but if you win this game, people will be happy, and the season will be a success.

"I said a little while ago that you guys were making your own history today, and you really are. This is not like any other game in this rivalry, or in the entire history of college football. I coached some of these games where both teams were unbeaten, but never when it was 1 versus 2. But you guys, you are now living that dream, and I hope you appreciate it. Years from now you will be able to tell your children and grandchildren that you participated in one of the greatest moments in sporting history: The Ohio State-Michigan game.

"And men, I sincerely hope you can add to that phrase...'AND WE WON!'"

Time For a Change?

"No organization is stronger than the quality of its leadership, or ever extends its constituency far beyond the degree to which its leadership is representative." - Edgar Powell

Before I get into this week's piece, I'd like to preface it with a little disclaimer. I am, and always have been, a big Steeler fan. I'm not one of the bandwagon folks that have only started liking them in the past couple years. I was there in 1992 when Barry Foster ran for 190 yards against the Jets. I saw Randy Fuller break up Jim Harbaugh's Hail Mary in the '95 AFC Championship. I was also there in '99 when the expansion Browns beat the Steelers, and later that year when our boys beat the Panthers in blinding snow in an absolutely meaningless game for either team. I know that Courtney Hawkins owns the team record for catches in a game. Yes, unlike most of the recent casual fans, I can name Steeler receivers other than Hines Ward. I didn't buy a jersey or Terrible Towel because it would make me look cool. By the same token, I think those pink Steeler jerseys are an abomination, and anyone wearing them should be slapped silly. Now, on with the show...

I have always been a Bill Cowher fan, and anytime KDKA or those other channels would interview some drunk buffoon in a restaurant after a loss and that person would say, "Duh, they should fire Cowher cause he stinks and they lost and I have no idea what I'm talking about," I would get pissed. People around here have such ridiculously high expectations, and they really don't know how lucky we are to have Cowher as a coach. In fourteen years, they have only missed the playoffs four times. He's the longest-tenured coach in the league, and since his hiring in 1992 there have been about a zillion coaching changes in the NFL. Through it all, we've had Cowher, and the Steeler organization is much better off for it.

However, things have become much different this year, and the future of the team is up in the air. After winning the Super Bowl last year, the Steelers are 2-5 this year, with the most recent loss occurring this past Sunday at the hands of the hilariously awful Oakland Raiders. Despite only getting 98 yards of offense, the Raiders beat the Steelers, 20-13, thanks to two Ben Roethlisberger interceptions that were returned for touchdowns. As bad as the Raiders looked, the Steelers were worse, looking confused and at times like they just didn't give a damn.

If the ho-hum performance of the team wasn't bad enough, Cowher's reaction on the field and with the media has been even more troubling. The young Cowher of the early 90s was not afraid to snap at a player on the sideline, showering him with spit. It didn't matter who it was, from the rookie to the superstar to the veteran that was only a couple years younger than Cowher was; if you messed up you would hear about it, and it wouldn't be pretty. The Steelers of that era were disciplined, successful, and they knew who ran the team: Bill freaking Cowher.

Fast forward to the past couple years. Fumbles, interceptions, and blown coverages are no longer followed by an explosion on the part of Cowher, but rather a shot of him standing on the sideline, arms folded, shaking his head. Remember that press conference in 1998 after a loss to the Titans when Cowher forced Ed Bouchette to ask him if he was going to bench Kordell just so he could yell "NO!"? That's now replaced by a calm, quiet, "We tried. We left it all out on the field. We now have to concentrate on the next game. (Insert coaching cliche here)." Maybe it's maturity, or maybe it's the wear and tear of 15 years of being the head coach for the same team, but the fire and intensity that once endeared Cowher to both players and fans are gone.

Now, I don't claim to be an expert on coaching styles. I don't know if yelling and throwing stuff really makes a difference when it comes to a team's performance, but it's obvious that Cowher has lost touch with his team. A few weeks ago, Willie Parker, Verron Haynes, and Mike Logan committed moronic unsportsmanlike conduct penalties in a loss to the Bengals. After the game Cowher assured the press that such a thing would never happen again. Last week against the Falcons, Hines Ward decided to join Nate Washington's touchdown dance troupe. Since the NFL banned multi-player celebrations this past offseason, this little ballet led to another unsportsmanlike conduct penalty. In essence, Ward was completely disobeying his coach's edict, and since he's the top receiver and a media darling, there isn't much Cowher can do about it.

This lack of discipline has even spread to the management. After that Falcons game, Dan Rooney earned himself a $25,000 fine by calling the false start penalty on Washington "ridiculous", and basically whining like a kid that didn't get his way. I don't know what he was trying to accomplish by doing this, but unless it was to make himself look stupid and not like the well-respected figure in the NFL that he is, it didn't work.

So what needs to be done? Does Cowher need to find that old spark he had in 1992, or should he just give up, retire, and move to North Carolina like everyone is predicting? Does Rooney need to step in and either put a foot in Cowher's ass or give him the boot? And what about the players? They certainly deserve some of the blame for this mess, but how much? After all, we deify them to the point that their egos have to swell no matter how humble they may be. When you are treated like you can do no wrong, eventually you start to believe it, and you act accordingly. Perhaps a bad season is what they need. The fairweather fans will disappear and less attention will be showered upon them. Then maybe they'll realize they're making money to play football and win, not dance around or taunt or appear on commercials.

Until something changes, expect the fall of the empire to continue, especially this weekend against Denver.